Eulogy

I imagine you’re all as conflicted as I am at the passing of our acquaintance, coworker, and frequent moocher, Jacob. Granted, he may not have been kind to friends, family, service workers, or his own dog. He spoke dismissively about people in front of their back, which I guess is their front. His politics were abhorrent to everyone, which is no small feat. Despite having no skills in any particular area, Jacob gladly tore down others for even trying. But what he lacked in talent, he made up for in rudeness. In short, maybe he’ll be missed by someone, hopefully?